Defunct comms link connected to nothing at a fire station – for 15 years
- Reference: 1680510487
- News link: https://www.theregister.co.uk/2023/04/03/who_me/
- Source link:
This week, we once again meet "Bernard", who in times past found himself working for "a rural local authority in Middle England" – which sounds like he was either working with Chaucer or Hobbits. Since he was doing network support, we think some other explanation more likely.
At some point, Bernard's bailiwick was extended to include telephony support, which had previously been the responsibility of the building support team.
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That go-getting group had taken a firm "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" attitude – unless something was on fire, they left it alone.
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Now, we've all been in places like that. Everything seems to be working fine, so we don't necessarily wonder what it all does. People come and go, and gradually the institutional knowledge of each box's function fades into legend.
Bernard, however, was a go-getter who wanted to get a handle on what everything was and did. He discovered, unsurprisingly, that there were a number of "left-over remnants of outdated and abandoned systems" as well as PWs – "private wires" for sometimes obscure purposes.
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He also learned that all of these services were being billed on the regular, and that had to change.
[5]Botched migration resulted in a great deal: One for the price of two
[6]IT phone home: How to run up a $20K bill in two days and get away with it by blaming Cisco
[7]Techie wiped a server, nobody noticed, so a customer kept paying for six months
[8]Don't worry, that system's not actually active – oh, wait …
Tracking most of the services was fairly straightforward, and led to numerous iterations of "Oh that phone number was for XXX service years ago. We don't do that now" from various managers. There were also tense meetings with the account manager from the provider, who wasn't keen to stop the rivers of free money – and certainly not to provide refunds.
When Bernard got to the very last of the unaccounted PWs, he discovered from its prefix that it was related to a fire service. He tracked the other end to the Town Hall, where it was "jumpered to something, somewhere unidentifiable."
But did that stop Bernard? Clearly you don't know him. He eventually tracked down an unconnected end at the local fire station that seemed a likely candidate. But the firefighters denied any knowledge of it – except one. The longest-serving fireman at the station, a veteran we'll call "Greg," remembered: they used to have such dedicated private lines, but "we stopped doing that and the lines were taken out 15 years ago!"
Fifteen years. Bernard and the telco provider agreed between them that this was a bit much. There had clearly been negligence on both sides, so a refund for seven and a half years worth of the service was forthcoming. Which just goes to show that sometimes it's worth fixing something that ain't broke.
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[5] https://www.theregister.com/2023/03/27/who_me/
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Re: Money for nothing, it's the best
I'm pleased they didn't fire him for just doing his job...
Re: Money for nothing, it's the best
It'd be interesting to see if he climbed the career ladder
Re: Money for nothing, it's the best
He got hosed down.
Working for a very small ISP, I can say these things are still common today. When I took over running the place, I noticed there were a number of lines that never had any activity, and I thought I'd call up the customer and enquire whether they're satisfied with the service provided. But without a "Bernard" at the other end, these calls never went anywhere meaningful.
Got a cancellation last week for one that had been inactive at least 5 years. No request for refund. I'm surprised Bernard's provider agreed to refunding over 7 years worth.
Perhaps the contract with Bernard's employer was a very lucrative one and they didn't want to encourage anyone to get comparative quotes?
Back in the days when I worked in high street retail we had a self service point with a phone so customers could contact head office customer service. It was a bare handset that simply dialed a head office line when lifted.
Some customers realised, however, that if they unplugged that handset they could plug their own phone into the line and dial any number they liked, and it all went on our bill.
Eventually a refit removed that facility, but nobody thought to turn off the phone line, and so certain customers would still come in and use the line.
During one of our managers lengthy absences I drew the short straw and so it was my turn to become "executive officer for the week"
Out of sheer boardom one day I decided to check the phone bills and one instantly jumped out, because only two phones in the building had unrestricted international dialling, and this wasn't one of those lines.
It turns out when the people using the line were phoning relatives abroad, and some where dialling premium rate chatlines, the monthly bill was in the high four digits for a line that should have been disconnected years previously.
After a panicked call to head office blame was shared equally between the head office bod who was supposed to disconnect the line, and the absent store manager who clearly never checked through the monthly phone bills.
Fun(d) distribution
...so a refund for seven and a half years worth of the service was forthcoming.
And the other seven and a half years of refund was deposited into Bernard's account?
Would only be fair!
" The longest-serving fireman at the station, a veteran we'll call "Greg," remembered "
Was Sam unavailable?
Money for nothing, it's the best
--> sipping a cool one at the shores of the rivers of cash flow