News: 1675067228

  ARM Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life (Terry Pratchett, Jingo)

Shag pile PC earned techies a carpeting from HR

(2023/01/30)


Who, Me? Welcome once again dear readers to Who, Me? in which we recount the heroic (and sometimes less so) antics of Regizens in the workplace.

This week we're hearing from a reader we'll Regomize as "Ben". Back in the 1990s Ben and his buddy "Jay" would sometimes play merry pranks upon their cubicle-mate "Sherm". Nothing nasty - just harmless stuff to pass the time.

Then one day Ben arrived to find that several of the floor tiles in his area had been removed, and he knew exactly who was responsible. He spotted the jape in time, so no harm was done. But upon mature reflection he decided it was just a tad dangerous from a health and safety standpoint.

[1]

So before any lines were crossed that couldn't be uncrossed, Ben thought a word in Sherm's ear might de-escalate things.

[2]

[3]

"Hey, that was a genius idea," he began, "but a bit risky."

"I can't take all the credit," replied Sherm, "it was Jay's idea."

[4]

Wait just one dog-gone second here. Jay? The prankster who had been Ben's own accomplice was also guiding Sherm's nefarious schemes?

So much for de-escalation. Ben and Sherm decided to teach puppetmaster Jay a prank-tastic lesson.

[5]Dear Stupid, I write with news I did not check the content of the [Name] field before sending this letter

[6]Sysadmin infected bank with 'alien virus' that sucked CPUs dry

[7]Mixing an invisible laser and a fire alarm made for a disastrous demo

[8]When we asked how you crashed the system we wanted an explanation not a demonstration

Now, as it happens, the office had a stockpile of adhesive carpet squares sitting in the receiving dock. They did not match the office's interior, so were apparently of no use to anyone and had sat there for some time.

Ben and Sherm put them to good use, upholstering Jay's workspace – desk, chair, monitor, even his Compaq PC – with adhesive carpet.

When Jay arrived, he thought it was hilarious! People came from all over the office to see the plush cubicle.

[9]

When the manager responsible for the carpet squares saw it, he was less impressed. Waste of corporate resources, and so on.

Which was how Ben and Sherm found themselves in the HR vice-president's office, worried about the consequences of their actions.

The HR VP entered the room and didn't even sit down.

"That was one of the funniest pranks I've seen in 35 years! Don't do it again," he said.

And then he left.

Have you had a lucky escape thanks to a boss who saw the funny side? Or indeed, have you had a small error blown out of proportion by a humorless manager? Tell us about it in an [10]email to Who, Me? and we will immortalize your exploits for the ages in these very pages. ®

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[5] https://www.theregister.com/2023/01/23/who_me/

[6] https://www.theregister.com/2023/01/16/who_me/

[7] https://www.theregister.com/2023/01/09/who_me/

[8] https://www.theregister.com/2022/12/19/who_me/

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[10] mailto:whome@theregister.com

[11] https://whitepapers.theregister.com/



Korev

> "That was one of the funniest pranks I've seen in 35 years! Don't do it again," he said.

Sounds like he was floored by the prank...

KittenHuffer

At least they were called on the carpet for it!

-------> Mine's the one with the shag in the pocket! (Tobacco! Not pile!)

Neil Barnes

But... the common cormorant, or shag, lays eggs inside a paper bag!

Scott 53

Almost put their jobs on the lino.

Anonymous South African Coward

Any photos of that epic cubicle?

Will Godfrey

Good point. Might just be a shag-e dog story

Inventor of the Marmite Laser

Nice twist.

Be hessian you again soon

Ah, yes, the double crossover cross!

chivo243

You have to admire someone who will play both ends against the middle, hoping to come out unscathed! I prefer to be the instigator, drop the seed, and let others do the dirty work!

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.