Porsche wants to sell you a rusty tailpipe soundbar for $12k
- Reference: 1667402110
- News link: https://www.theregister.co.uk/2022/11/02/porsche_tailpipe_soundbar/
- Source link:
The specs on the 1.5m (5ft), 65kg (143lb) Porsche 911 Soundbar 2.0 Pro are exactly what one would expect from a typical expensive Bluetooth speaker, with a 2.1.2 virtual surround system and support for pretty much every premium streaming service available.
While it can be showcased as a wall-mounted unit, it also comes with legs in case your walls can't support that much ostentation.
[2]
This isn't the first speaker Porsche has designed, nor is it the first to feature the exhaust system of one of its automobiles, as the 2.0 in the new speaker's name eluded. The [3]previous version of the 911 Soundbar, also produced in limited amounts over a [4]few [5]different [6]releases , is far smaller and meant to sit on top of a surface. And it costs far less – $4,250 (£3,470) in the UK and US shops.
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[8]
The older version is also arguably nicer looking as it appears Porsche took the time to clean and repaint the 911 GT3 exhaust systems used as a passive subwoofer extension in that model.
[9]
The smaller 911 Soundbar looks a bit more finished
Photos of the 2.0 soundbar show clean exhaust tips but with rusty welds and other signs of wear on the rest of the exhaust system – hardly the refined look you would expect from $12,000 sound equipment doubling as "wall art." Then again, straight off the car could be in vogue for collectors of Porsche bits right now.
The 911 Soundbar 2.0 in its natural habitat: cold concrete walls adjacent to a garage
A fun little feature is the 300W power behind the massive speaker, which is the same as the capability of the original design. There's no arguing that 300W is a lot of sound, but again, for three times the price one might expect Porsche would have given the actual sound system a boost too.
[10]Tesla reportedly faces criminal probe into self-driving hype
[11]GM: Seeing as all y'all like our electric cars, we'll double output next year
[12]Self-driving tech startup values crash 81% in 2 years
[13]Foxconn shows off pair of EVs, boasts of bulk orders for last year's model
As long as the rattling exhaust doesn't shake one's [14]$74,000 maglev turntable out of alignment, this new piece of rusty wall art should go great in a [15]man cave , but hard to place anywhere else.
Preorders for the Porsche 911 Soundbar 2.0 Pro are open now, with the speaker set to go on sale January 1. For those worried that they may not be able to get their hands on one of the 500 pieces being made, don't worry – two versions of the smaller 911 Soundbar that came out earlier this year in red and yellow are limited to just 50, and are still available on Porsche's accessories website. ®
Get our [16]Tech Resources
[1] https://www.porsche-design.com/us/en/porsche-design-shop/shop/electronics/sound/speaker/wap0509110nsdb-911-soundbar-2.0-pro/?variationCode=WAP0509110NSDB&utm_source=DesignTAXI&utm_medium=DesignTAXI&utm_term=DesignTAXI&utm_content=DesignTAXI&utm_campaign=DesignTAXI&source=aw&awc=11151_1667225080_2bc6667e7f21d189f5b82de0e69696b0
[2] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=2&c=2Y2KiL18ijaDb9BhK0wvGlgAAAAQ&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D2%26raptor%3Dcondor%26pos%3Dtop%26test%3D0
[3] https://www.porsche-design.com/gb/en/porsche-design-shop/shop/electronics/sound/speaker/p9160-911-soundbar-limited-edition/?variationCode=4046901869373
[4] https://www.porsche-design.com/us/en/porsche-design-shop/shop/electronics/sound/speaker/p9160-911-soundbar/?variationCode=4046901984007&=true
[5] https://www.porsche-design.com/us/en/porsche-design-shop/shop/electronics/sound/speaker/wap0501110nsbf-911-soundbar-final-edition-karminrot/?variationCode=WAP0501110NSBF
[6] https://www.porsche-design.com/us/en/porsche-design-shop/shop/electronics/sound/speaker/wap0501130nsbf-911-soundbar-final-edition-racinggelb/?variationCode=WAP0501130NSBF
[7] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=4&c=44Y2KiL18ijaDb9BhK0wvGlgAAAAQ&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D4%26raptor%3Dfalcon%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0
[8] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=3&c=33Y2KiL18ijaDb9BhK0wvGlgAAAAQ&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D3%26raptor%3Deagle%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0
[9] https://regmedia.co.uk/2022/11/02/red911sounbar.jpg
[10] https://www.theregister.com/2022/10/27/doj_self_driving_car_criminal/
[11] https://www.theregister.com/2022/10/26/gm_q3_ev_sales/
[12] https://www.theregister.com/2022/10/18/selfdriving_tech_values/
[13] https://www.theregister.com/2022/10/18/foxconn_ev_expansion/
[14] https://www.theregister.com/2022/10/11/esoteric-grandioso-turntable/
[15] https://www.latimes.com/archives/blogs/la-at-home/story/2012-03-16/death-of-the-man-cave-1992-2012
[16] https://whitepapers.theregister.com/
Re: Every time
But have you read the article (this edition) about Minecraft and Burberry?
Re: Every time
You ask me, it's things like this that offer the best proof we are just NPCs in a giant computer simulation. We must be living in the test environment, which explains all the conspiracy theory nonsense and... well... things like this.
VW version
Actually puts out exhaust and gasses you
As the saying goes....
"One born every minute."
Then again there's enough 14 year old millionaires on TikTok who would buy a dog turd on a chain if Ferrari, Porsche or Lamborgini slapped one of their labels on it, so I guess this will probably sell a few units to those with more money than sense.
Re: As the saying goes....
"One born every minute." The school of Barnumomics. Can I get one installed in my self driving car?
I can only think that Porsche affiliated groups would go for something like this. The sales office of an aftermarket Porsche upgrade shop, parts dealer, body and fender repair company specializing in Porsche.
Re: As the saying goes....
"One born every minute."
I was thinking of "a fool and his money are soon parted". But yours is appropriate also.
Re: As the saying goes....
> 14 year old millionaires on TikTok
Yeah, those losers.
Now excuse me I have to go and wait in the rain for the train to take me to my job where I file TPS reports in a cubicle for 9 hours for enough money to cover my mortgage OR heating bill.
Perhaps
Prospective buyers might donate the cash to the nearest food bank instead... if they want to feel good about themselves. An ancient laptop, amp and pair of speakers would do a better job than this tat and look better too.
it doesn't come with factory-installed rattling?
You mean it doesn't come with the fumes of 2.7L engine-oil-burning-on-the-exhaust pipe being blown into the cabin by the heater?
Damn, that was the best part of my old '75 911.
That was a damn fine (and F-ing fast) car.
For this much money…
…I’d at least want it to recreate the genuine exhaust sound with a little ‘start’ button and an accelerator.
Vroom vroom!!
Automotive audio specifications
I presume that 300W means, "rail-to-rail output swing against a speaker cone moving in the opposite direction during an overvoltage condition, then rounded up to the nearest 100."
And made of thin stamped rusty stainless steel, the rare but preferred material of the very finest speakers, combined with audiophile Bluetooth transport.
Real audiophiles won't touch it as it's digital!
On a list of reasons why an audiophile wouldn't touch this, "digital" comes in around № 6.
Every time
when I think that things can't possibly get any more bizarre, sure enough, they do...