The ginger nut is and should be top tier. The term ginger nut has 3 meanings. I don't see your fancy party ring with that accolade.

Yep the ginger nut plus the dead fly* biscuits are definitely barrel toppers.

*I believe some people believe that dead fly biscuits should be named after some bald bloke called Gary but this is incorrect.

"dead fly biscuits"

You do, of course, mean fruit shortcake, rather than the reprocessed cardboard named for the bald geezer.

Ginger nuts are indeed fantastic, and their low-tier presence is disturbing.

It's been a while since I had a fig roll, and they are indeed also excellent, and other classics have also been named, such as shortbread.

Bourbons are good, but digestives as winners? Where are the Hob-nobs? What about a Club, Penguin, and so on. If we stretch the definition a bit too much, we could even come to Tunnock's caramel wafers..

I'm now developing quite the hunger...

Fig rolls are good. Shortbread is great.

But for an accompaniment to tea, surely the Hobnob has no worthy challengers.

"Fig rolls are good."

Only in small numbers. Those of us with *ahem* delicate persuasions need to be careful with how many we can consume.

Sorry to disagree but this is important - Clubs, Penguins etc are not biscuits, they're clearly chocolate bars (albeit with varying amounts of biscuit inside.)

Also - my love of gritty, fibrous wholemeal foods notwithstanding, Hob-nobs are like chocolate digestives made when the factory have run out of flour and are down to sweeping the yard for ingredients!

Warning: reality error!

You seem to have mistaken the king of biscuits - the plain chocolate hobnob - for something entirely less palatable.

They are right on the edge of biscuitness, I'll give you that.

But you have to admit, there's a fair bit of biscuit in a Penguin or Club. That said, the focus is, I agree, the chocolate. I just had to throw them in so they weren't entirely forgotten (the caramel wafer is clearly not a biscuit).

I too am deeply offended by the relegation of the ginger nut an essential adjunct to both tea and coffee.

Shortcake fingers also play an important part in the enjoyment of a cuppa.

Regarding the 'biscuit' status of Weetabix, it does comply in terms of construction and shape, take a look at a carpenter's biscuit jointer for example. However, as a dunkable accompaniment to tea or coffee, it fails abysmally.

On a slight side note: should you ever find yourself stuck with a less than quaffable fed wine, try dunking ginger nuts in it. It works surprisingly well.

Let not us forget hot or cold chocolate (yes, the latter is a thing)!

Your analysis is correct in absolutely every particular - because it accords with my own opinion^H^H^H^H^H^Hfact.

There is no reason for argument in the comments - this matter is not up for debate, and closed.

The absolute best biscuit in the World is the Australian Tim Tam.

The only people foolish enough to argue this point are those that have yet to experience its Chocolatey delight. Or Crazy People.

End of Argument.

Yes, while reading the article and that half baked list I too was thinking of (and longing for) Tim Tams. I saw something almost but not entirely quite like them in Norway once, though I have forgotten the name under which they were sold.

I'll stumble across to the next building, me and some office mates have a freezer with ice cream there. There are no cookies, nor biscuits in the office (though I need to check with a certain colleague...)

I've never tried Tim Tams, but Anzacs are amazingly good.

Weetbix might be the best cereal there is. But it is no more of a biscuit than a rash of bacon is. Hmmm Bacon....

But it's not even the best cereal - Oatibix is better.

This study is hugely flawed because it fails to distinguish between McV's milk chocolate digestives (OK if nothing else available) and dark chocolate digestives (absolutely the best biscuit in the world ever, no argument).

These are facts, not opinions.

The only fact obvious here is that your taste buds are broken! (I'll give you the Oatibix though, I dare say it's the superior texture you are appreciating.)

The wetabix marketing team have done this before with baked beans. I hope some of the profits go to the charity.

My mum used to make something she called Australian Fudge by crushing tea biscuits, mixing various things (butter, sugar, dead flies, etc.), spreading it on a tray, and coating it with chocolate. And when I was about four, I got to do the crushing with a rolling pin - an important life skill.

Tea biscuits also tend to be safer for dunking in your tea - an important lesson we all learned as youngsters.

Sounds like an adequate mixture for lollie cake if it was any more moist and had colourful marshmallowy thingies on it

I was going to suggest that El Reg should do their own biscuit-off, but upon reading their incorrect opinion about the magnificent Rich Tea biscuit, they can sod right off.

( Although the plain hobnob is surely the champion )

At least they didn't grace the execrable Oreos with so much as a mention.

I don't see why we had to import such things, when we already have custard creams and bourbons.

well, those two, as well as a good selection of other cookies / biscuits that actually taste quite nice, which is much more than can be said about that abomination mentioned above.

I just meant that those two are most similar to the Oreo in design. Many other excellent biscuits and snacks are available.

Obvious case of having handed decision making to AI.

I think they're trolling us. They can't possibly believe that list.

Although I do remain utterly bewildered by the miserable inability of supermarkets to offer chocolate cookies made _with_ chocolate and not covered in it. Similarly chocolate digestives are a sticky fingered horror that ruins the enjoyment of a tasty crumbling masterpiece.

My cupboard right now has custard creams and bourbons in it. Cheap, filling and lacking in pretentiousness.

...is making me hungry!

Time for the elevenses* biscuits I think, for the record they're Ginger Nuts.

*How well the day is going determines whether they are, in fact, consumed at eleven o'clock, on a bad day it an be as early as nine!

I believe you have the cart before the horse. Whether elevenses are consumed at eleven determines how well the day is going, clearly.

I contend that the Ginger Nut is in fact effectively Schrodingers biscuit being simultaneously a top tier and lowest rung biscuit being simultaneously one of the worst and one of the best biscuits until its state vector collapses in one of two ways depending on the presence or absence of a cup of tea to dunk it in when the packet is opened.

Outrageous!

You've clearly not seen the new king of biscuits. Biscoff (the little cinnamon/burnt sugar thing you get with a cup of coffee) have launched a custard-cream-style version, with either chocolate, vanilla or even (brace yourself) biscoff flavour cream centres. In my eyes, there are no other biscuits anymore.

This time next year the debate in the UK will be about the best kind of sawdust to make biscuits from.

Did you know that you can buy cherry Jaffa Cakes? How on earth is that possible? More importantly, WHY is it posible?

To be totally honest, I'm surprised that the world is still existing despite this dastardly abuse of cakery by McVities.

I mean, cherry? Jaffa? Urgh!

*shivers at the outrageous thought*

Disclaimer: I have nothing against cherries, jaffas or cakes. But cherry Jaffa Cakes? *sighs*

Frankly anything (Oreo excepted) has to be better tasting than the conventional "hint of bile" Jaffa Cake. I'm sorry to have to say it, but it's true - they're revolting in taste, smell and above all texture.

I found out yesterday that you can buy orange flavoured Vimto.

What is the world coming to when Vimto comes in flavours other than Vimto?

First of all, having recently had me first dealings with Macmillan nurses - and very nice they are, too - since I was diagnosed with cancer, they can say what they bloody well want because, well, they're lovely people. They're right about Chocolate Digestives being top, in any case, so there's that.

Finally, the writer should know better than to say sugar causes hyperactivity in kids. Rotten teeth, yes. Hyperactivity, no.

So there.

Totally agree about the Macmillan Nurses, wonderful people who work quietly in the background.

Good luck, Sam.

So we've got the Bourbon biscuits and the Garibaldi biscuits, but where's the Peek Freans Trotsky Assortment?

Revolutionary biscuits of Italy

Rise up out of your box

You have nothing to lose but your wafers!

Yum yum yum yum yum

... yes, the one with the complete Young Ones DVD set in the pocket, please. No, I'll see myself out. No, you don't need to call the police.

My top list would be biased against anything with chocolate (though that was not always the case so will allow Plain Chocolate Digestives an honorary top-rank rating based on my younger days), but how can the Malted Milk not be there in the list?

Shorties also make a good dunking biscuit, preferable the rectangular one rather than the round ones...