Home office setup with built-in boiling water tap for tea and coffee without getting up is a monument to deskcess
- Reference: 1618578067
- News link: https://www.theregister.co.uk/2021/04/16/ultimate_working_from_home_desk/
- Source link:
Games room specialist Liberty Games says it undertook research to discover UK remote workers' ideal desk and whipped up a concept that "meets all your working-from-home needs."
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As technical director Stuart Kerr explained: "With the shift to working from home, we saw an opportunity to create a desk concept that would meet the needs of British home workers. We wanted to make sure we included some fun features in the desk... to ensure people were still making time for themselves. I think the sleek and modern aesthetic of the desk and the cool features make this desk one of a kind."
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Click to enlarge
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This being Britain, a boiling water tap for instant tea and coffee seems to be the killer app here. That is, until you see the other features:
Vitamin D sun lamp to improve your mood and increase overall happiness!
Built-in tablet, ideal for note-taking or illustrative design work!
Built-in speakers to allow you to pop on your favourite playlist whilst you work or connect to your team calls for more concentrated meetings!
Heated foot massager underneath the desk so no more cold or aching feet!
Built-in fridge, where you can chill your beer or wine ready for post-work drinks! You can keep snacks or milk in there too!
Wellness alarm clock, which has pre-set reminders to ensure you take breaks and stand up and walk around!
Hang about. Alarm clock to remind you to get off your sweaty arse? See, maybe you would have already risen several times this morning to grab a beverage or biscuit from the kitchen .
Except you didn't because you got milk out the built-in fridge and rustled up a cuppa with on-hand teabags thanks to the built-in boiling water tap.
Far from promoting wellness, this wunderdesk seems more appropriate to what most of us already are – fat slobs. The only thing that seems to be missing for this purpose is a built-in bog. Just imagine the productivity gains!
Reg man 0: Japanese electronic toilet 1 [4]READ MORE
The desk is such a textbook solution in search of a problem that it had to create a solution to a problem of its own making by reminding owners that, yeah, getting up every hour or two is probably a good idea lest you fancy a bout of deep-vein thrombosis.
Some other issues: speakers, particularly these monsters, are suboptimal audio devices for videoconferencing – the given use case. Put some bloody headphones on unless your team loves the sound of their own voices echoing back at them.
Heated foot massager? You're at home; wear slippers or toasty socks.
Ah, but we've left one feature out for the sake of comedic timing – the pull-out table-tennis table.
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Hello there
Liberty says: "Your lunchtime just got more fun – simply slide out the table, and start your table-tennis battle with your partner, flatmate or family member."
If you can afford the [6]£7,995 asking price for the desk, we sincerely doubt you'd still be slumming it with a flatmate. As for family members, unless you're a multimillionaire, they'd be asking: "Why didn't you refit the bathroom/take us on holiday/do anything besides buying this monument to excess?"
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So that'll be ping-pong for one. ®
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[1] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/bootnotes&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=2&c=2YHm0lpVLCN6pn0YtbmtvQQAAAE8&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D2%26raptor%3Dcondor%26pos%3Dtop%26test%3D0
[2] https://regmedia.co.uk/2021/04/16/deskclosed.jpg
[3] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/bootnotes&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=3&c=33YHm0lpVLCN6pn0YtbmtvQQAAAE8&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D3%26raptor%3Deagle%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0
[4] https://www.theregister.com/2016/11/23/electronic_toilet_japan_defeats_reg_man/
[5] https://regmedia.co.uk/2021/04/16/desktabletennis.jpg
[6] https://www.libertygames.co.uk/store/table-tennis/features/ultimate-wfh-desk/
[7] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/bootnotes&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=4&c=44YHm0lpVLCN6pn0YtbmtvQQAAAE8&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D4%26raptor%3Dfalcon%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0
[8] https://whitepapers.theregister.com/
I’d rather use my iPad than a built in tablet, then I can pick it up and move it around, and it is probably far superior to the one they provide.
Get a b'desk!
For £2,000 you can get a double bed that folds flat against the wall and has a desk underneath it. The single version is about £1,400 - the desktop is gimballed so that it stays upright as the bed is folded back down.
I'm happy to stand up to get my cuppa, the excercise is good for me. And if it tires me too much, then simply fold down the bed and sleep away the afternoon.
Penguin icon, because cuddly toy to help keep away the nightmares (about the boss catching me!).
Re: Get a b'desk!
They want £8k.
BOM:
Low capacity Quooker tap: £720 - assumes plumbing is readily available, both source and waste, plus electrics in place. Perhaps this desk has bodged a "refill with water every day" tank for it to add a little more.
Built-in speakers (presumably with a USB/Aux connector to hook up your rig to) - if BRAND == BOSE, price = £1000, else price=£200 (generous to allow for "built in").
Fridge - small under-desk unit, £100-200
Slabs of material to assemble, Ikea style - looks to be aluminium, but could be a silvered wood, or even just laminate. Perhaps £1000 including all the fittings like the crap monitor stand and keyboard/mouse floating storage shelf.
Sun lamp: £30-100 retail
Foot rest with warmer: £50?
Table tennis bit (looks a bit shit and narrow, imho): £50
"Built in" tablet for note taking: £200
Alarm clock: £10
I may be slightly out, but struggling to get to a £3k BOM, so the rest is pure profit.
Also, very amusing to mount the tap in the corner with seemingly no drainage to take spillages away from the built in tablet just in front of it.
As others have mentioned, a portable commode is all you need to complete this. Available for around £30 online (may not be that luxurious!)
Because the thing I really miss is crappy office coffee.
Oh wait, it isn't. I'd much rather drink nice Lavazza from my home coffee machine than poorly heated Legionnaires' disease coffee made from a warm tap.
er...
All that and no keyboard shelf and its a bit 'cornery' too...
They clearly don't know anything about working from home. Making a cup of tea is a great excuse to get away from your desk for a few minutes, relax, stretch legs, do a bit of washing up, tidy the junk drawer, cut the grass, clean the hob igniters so they light first time, stick some tea towels to soak with a bit of bleach, put the bike lights on charge, make another cup of tea, then get back to work.
it's a joke right?
reminds me of when homer simpson designed a car
https://simpsons.fandom.com/wiki/The_Homer
Re: it's a joke right?
Rack and Peanut steering! Did this car have the separate compartment for the Mother-in-law? or was that the Jetsons? Or The Car of Tomorrow?
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0043381/mediaviewer/rm2013707521/?context=default
Re: it's a joke right?
> ...separate compartment for the Mother-in-law?
That's what an open trailer is for. Extra fun when it rains.
Ergonomic swings, roundabouts...
Well as Fr Ted said, it is a bit cornery, and there's no keyboard tray so your posture is going to be crap.
But on the plus side, you'll get plenty of exercise polishing the bloody thing, plus a bit of yoga crawling about underneath to disconnect/replace the doubtless crappy speakers.
And there are no drawers, so you'll have to give your side abs a bit of a workout to get anything out of the cupboard. Another benefit will be the added exercise of that occasional leap to your feet when some of that boiling water comes across the desk towards your unmentionables.
"sleek and modern aesthetic"
Wot? This monstrosity looks like the worst possible outcome of just gluing random parts together. I fear for my eyeballs looking at it!
misread title
I thought it was something dreamed up by Priti Vacant to interrogate refugees.
Only for the insecure or office "hero" I guess?
"a boiling water tap for instant tea and coffee seems to be the killer app here. "
Doesn't make sense unless the respondents really didn't take it seriously, or they targeted lots of those insecure / hero types that feel they can't be away from their desk for more than a few minutes. Going down to the kitchen to make tea and/or to have that regular break from the screen is a very welcome relief, and I would expect part of most companies updated H&S policies for working from home for extended periods. It certainly was at the client I'm working for.
RA
Can I see the risk assessment for something that delivers a stream of boiling water onto your desk when you hit the wrong button, please?
Re: RA
Risks:
Equipment may be destroyed by influx of water.
Paperwork may be rendered illegible.
User may receive potentially fatal (>5% body area; which is the size of one hand) burns.
User may receive potentially fatal electric shocks from water contacting the electricity supply which is below the height of the tap. (it not being pictured as being above it suggests this at least...)
I'll take a dozen with a high voltage mains supplies to the desk with remote activation options for the taps.
Do you need gloves as well?
For keeping your hands warm whilst handling the documents you keep in the fridge
Re: Do you need gloves as well?
Well, you can warm those documents and your hands with boiling water. Brilliant!
Re: Do you need glasses as well?
"...chill your beer or wine ready for post-work drinks! "
I don't see a camera there.
Vitamin C lamp?
Does it shoot orange juice at you?