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Bless you: Yep, it's IBM's new name for tech services spinoff and totally not a hayfever medicine

(2021/04/12)


Logowatch It has been a busy couple of months for creatives toiling away in IBM's strategy boutique but the team has conjured marketing magic with a scintillating new brand name that will head up the breakaway Global Technology Services unit.

Kyndryl. Whisper it again. Kyndryl. It will be synonymous with quality tech infrastructure services, Big Blue promises. GTS will be spun out into a newly traded public entity in 2021 that until today's daring rebrand was simply known as New Co.

[1]

"Kyndryl evokes the spirit of true partnership and growth," said [2]Martin Schroeter , CEO at Kyndryl, which is definitely not a rural family dental practice with a sense of humour.

"Customers around the world will come to know Kyndryl as a brand that runs the vital systems at the heart of progress, as an independent company with the best global talent in the industry."

[3]

[4]

New York-based Kyndryl, says IBM, is a "modern adaptation" of two words that are "central" to the ID and mission of the services unit: "Kyn" was derived from kinship as "relationships with people – employees, customers and partners – are at the centre of the strategy, and that long-lasting relationships must be built and nurtured." The second component, "Dryl", was drawn from tendril, "bringing to mind new growth and the idea that… the business is always working toward advancing human process."

Brit IBM veteran wins unfair dismissal case after 2018's Global Technology Services redundancy bloodbath [5]READ MORE

IBM has worked hard to nurture talent in the soon-to-be renamed division – too hard, some might say. It has relentlessly [6]let blood in GTS over the past seven years to keep innovation fresh and help [7]develop the next generation of workers . The company has also sensibly managed the multibillion-dollar slide in the division's revenues to the point that GTS can stand on its own two feet. The spin-off is natural evolution and another step in the history of IBM.

With this theme in mind, Kyndryl chief marketing officer Maria Bartolome Winans said the new brand is "just the start of the journey" – though, according to one respected Wall Street analyst, the split represents the possible end of a career at IBM for thousands of GTS staff.

'20,000-plus staff' could face the chop in spin-off of IBM's IT outsourcing biz, says Wall Street analyst [8]READ MORE

Bartolome Winans added: "The meaning of the name will be built and enhanced over time from our behaviours, aspirations and actions, and what we enable our customers to do. Our vision is to be the leading company that designs, runs and modernises the critical technology infrastructure of the world’s most important businesses and institutions, ultimately powering human progress."

[9]

Join with us, Reg readers, in ushering in a new era for IBM's outgoing services unit, forever to be known as Kyndryl. ®

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[1] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_onprem/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=2&c=2YHRum@Oyutt4tX-WgSzeawAAAFU&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D2%26raptor%3Dcondor%26pos%3Dtop%26test%3D0

[2] https://www.theregister.com/2021/01/07/ibm_rehires_former_aacountant/

[3] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_onprem/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=3&c=33YHRum@Oyutt4tX-WgSzeawAAAFU&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D3%26raptor%3Deagle%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0

[4] https://regmedia.co.uk/2021/04/12/kyndryl.jpg

[5] https://www.theregister.com/2021/02/04/ibm_unfair_redundancy_2018/

[6] https://www.theregister.com/2020/10/14/ibm_newco_spinof/

[7] https://www.theregister.com/2019/08/01/ibm_fired_100000_staff/

[8] https://www.theregister.com/2020/10/14/ibm_newco_spinof/

[9] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_onprem/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=4&c=44YHRum@Oyutt4tX-WgSzeawAAAFU&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D4%26raptor%3Dfalcon%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0

[10] https://whitepapers.theregister.com/

Fruit and Nutcase

kinship as "relationships with people – employees, ..

The ones that have got booted out due to age excepted

icon: Ginny the chopper

KinHell

Dave Pickles

Wonder how much that cost...

Paul Herber

New offshoots in the future: Kynnayl and Kynamma. It all end up Kyntytsup.

Aladdin Sane

Christ, my eyes.

Oh boy

Mr Dogshit

Sounds like a Scandinavian gnome.

Pronunciation?

Dr_N

Kin-Drill?

Kine-Drile?

K-Y 'n' Drill ?

Re: Pronunciation?

Arthur the cat

K-Y 'n' Drill ?

That a more vigorous version of Netflix and chill?

Anonymous Coward

Best part of it: new authorities include a CEO, a board president and a Chief Marketing Officer. Now CIO or CTO to be found in any of the announcements. You'd think a technology firm would like to fill those two spots at first...

A tip of the sombrero

Tom Paine

A shout out to anyone who's inherited an AD forest or tree named NEWCO...

Lifecycle of Bollocks

Anonymous Coward

It marks a point in any organisation's death spiral when it comes up with a wanky rebranding and spouts bollocks about how it embodies some sort of psycho-babble. Sometime the organisation survives - anyone remember when PWC renamed their consulting division "Monday" - but often the PR puff is actually just death rattles.

And why-oh-why-oh-why would any branding professional conceive a name that starts with 'kin ? That's just Kynaskingfortrouble™.

Re: Lifecycle of Bollocks

Anonymous Coward

Ironically, PwC was rescued from that rename fiasco... by selling the consulting division to IBM, where it became GBS.

Re: Lifecycle of Bollocks

Scotthva5

"...anyone remember when PWC renamed their consulting division "Monday?"

I certainly do AND the snafu that resulted from them forgetting to grab the mondays.co.uk domain, much to the delight of BT3A.

Someone never studied etymology (or spelling)

Mike 137

' "Kyn" was derived from kinship [...] "Dryl", was drawn from tendril. '

They'd maybe get away with "Kyn" at a pinch, but "dryl" makes no sense at all. The components of "tendril" are "tend" (to wander) and "ril" ( a suffix indicating the thing that does it). This problem is far from new, and typified by 'copter for helicopter. That breaks down etymologically into "helico" (rotating) and "pter" (a wing), so the particle "co" is actually meaningless.

This is not pedantry. Evolved words really do have intrinsic meanings based on their origins (albeit often pretty distantly). Just making up new noises is not how language genuinely evolves. Unfortunately the advent of mass communications has allowed what once would have been ephemeral arbitrary coinings to spread fast and widely so they enter the canon before they have been properly tested for their capacity to impart ideas.

The advantage of language evolving from its etymolgical roots is that it often allows an informed hearer or reader to be able to work out what an unfamiliar word may mean without recourse to a dictionary. Arbitrary coinings don't allow that - they have to be explained, which defeats the fundamental purpose of language.

Re: Someone never studied etymology (or spelling)

Dabooka

Interesting post, thank you. Especially the example of 'copter.

However surely it's kind of irrelevant in terms of the example of Kyndryl (whatever the hell they think it means), as surely that's been created not for the English language but as a trademarkable name for a new business entity.

As I say, not to detract from your post though as I found that interesting.

W1A

TimMaher

Anybody remember that?

I think IBM recruited some of their production team.

How else can we explain this drivel?

totally not a hayfever medicine

Arthur the cat

Damn! The loratadine doesn't seem to be working this year. Bloody trees!

Icon for what my eyes feel like.

How do you make a big 'Kin hole?

Anonymous Coward

With a big Kyndryl

Sounds Tolkienesque ...

Blofeld's Cat

Down came the Kyndryl from the hills, sowing confusion wherever they passed, and laying waste to all that was before them ...

Tendril? Really?

Anonymous Coward

A tendril is a parasitic creeper.

So that sounds about right.

Gnome?

Anonymous Coward

Looking forward to gyndryl, so I can switch back from KDE to Gnome.

Spelling

Sam not the Viking

Classic IBM mistake. There's no 'F' in kyndryl.

I wonder if anyone is going to get fired?

Avoid contact with eyes.