The wastepaper basket is on the other side of the office – that must be why they put all these slots in the computer
(2021/02/19)
- Reference: 1613722511
- News link: https://www.theregister.co.uk/2021/02/19/on_call/
- Source link:
On Call Can you smell burning? Is it the Friday morning bacon? Are you having a stroke? Or is it something more sinister? Find out in this week's episode of [1]On Call .
Regomised as "Will", our hero was the IT manager for a government department responsible for supporting lawmakers and looking after a number of security agencies and task forces.
[2]
The Regomiser takes anonymity very seriously so we'll leave it up to you to guess the country involved. The story itself takes place nearly 30 years ago.
"One such task force was aimed at overhauling national policy for targeted crime prevention," said Will. As is so often the case, one member was, as Will delicately put it, "a little bit hard of thinking" when it came to new technology.
[3]
The user's "lack of computer fluency was exceptional," he went on, "even for the 1990s."
We know it's hard to get your kicks at work – just do it away from a wall switch powering anything important [4]READ MORE
Will's day usually involved at least one visit to the user's desk to demonstrate, once again, how to change a font, reorder cells in a spreadsheet, or create a chart or two. The joy of impromptu training dispensed by an IT professional over and over again.
It went on like this until the day when The Call came in. Well used to the user's cries for help, Will answered the telephone, ready to tell the user where the "any" key was located and give instruction on where a mouse might be inserted.
Today's call was different. Smoke was coming out of the user's computer! Will barked out instructions to turn the device off and rushed to where it was located.
Unlike several contributors to this column, Will had managed to persuade the users that keeping their computers on their desks was A Good Idea since it stopped fluff from the floor being sucked into the inner workings and causing problems.
This PC was in the recommended position, on the desk, but was indeed emitting smoke. Nearby staff, perhaps hopeful of a morning trip to the local coffee shop, inquired if an evacuation might be in order.
Bravely, Will removed the case and peered within.
There was no evacuation needed today.
The user had come up with a fire-starting wheeze that Will had not anticipated.
"I found a 10-15cm stack of memo-cube type note paper inside the computer," he explained. "It had been building up over many months and nestling on the CPU and memory like a cosy thermal blanket.
"The stack had been nicely framed by the power supply (blocking the fan), some adapter cards and the side of the case. Until it started smouldering."
Will swiftly flipped the computer over and tipped the embers onto the floor, where he stomped them out.
The user never gave him an explanation for why the paper had been inserted. Will speculated that maybe dropping them into the wastebaskets destined for the shredder was not deemed secure enough. Or perhaps reaching for the bin was too much of an effort.
Whatever the reason, the user had spent the last few months feeding handwritten notes into the 1-2mm gap in the case between the blanking plates for the floppy drives (not fitted due to security requirements). Once the paper was out of sight, it was out of mind.
"Apart from a stern talking to from me," sighed Will, "there were no other repercussions" for the user.
"My visits to help," he said, "finally came to an end a few months later when the task force was moved to another government agency."
Hopefully not one responsible for Health and Safety.
[5]
Creativity is the name of the game when it comes to user-inflicted computer destruction. Share your tales of the surprises you found when answering a call for help. An email to [6]On Call is all it takes. ®
Get our [7]Tech Resources
[1] https://www.theregister.com/Tag/on-call
[2] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_personal_tech/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=2&c=2YC@aSSFSv60KSe7bkHyI8wAAANc&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D2%26raptor%3Dcondor%26pos%3Dtop%26test%3D0
[3] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_personal_tech/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=3&c=33YC@aSSFSv60KSe7bkHyI8wAAANc&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D3%26raptor%3Deagle%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0
[4] https://www.theregister.com/2021/02/12/on_call/
[5] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_personal_tech/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=4&c=44YC@aSSFSv60KSe7bkHyI8wAAANc&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D4%26raptor%3Dfalcon%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0
[6] mailto:oncall@theregister.com
[7] https://whitepapers.theregister.com/
Regomised as "Will", our hero was the IT manager for a government department responsible for supporting lawmakers and looking after a number of security agencies and task forces.
[2]
The Regomiser takes anonymity very seriously so we'll leave it up to you to guess the country involved. The story itself takes place nearly 30 years ago.
"One such task force was aimed at overhauling national policy for targeted crime prevention," said Will. As is so often the case, one member was, as Will delicately put it, "a little bit hard of thinking" when it came to new technology.
[3]
The user's "lack of computer fluency was exceptional," he went on, "even for the 1990s."
We know it's hard to get your kicks at work – just do it away from a wall switch powering anything important [4]READ MORE
Will's day usually involved at least one visit to the user's desk to demonstrate, once again, how to change a font, reorder cells in a spreadsheet, or create a chart or two. The joy of impromptu training dispensed by an IT professional over and over again.
It went on like this until the day when The Call came in. Well used to the user's cries for help, Will answered the telephone, ready to tell the user where the "any" key was located and give instruction on where a mouse might be inserted.
Today's call was different. Smoke was coming out of the user's computer! Will barked out instructions to turn the device off and rushed to where it was located.
Unlike several contributors to this column, Will had managed to persuade the users that keeping their computers on their desks was A Good Idea since it stopped fluff from the floor being sucked into the inner workings and causing problems.
This PC was in the recommended position, on the desk, but was indeed emitting smoke. Nearby staff, perhaps hopeful of a morning trip to the local coffee shop, inquired if an evacuation might be in order.
Bravely, Will removed the case and peered within.
There was no evacuation needed today.
The user had come up with a fire-starting wheeze that Will had not anticipated.
"I found a 10-15cm stack of memo-cube type note paper inside the computer," he explained. "It had been building up over many months and nestling on the CPU and memory like a cosy thermal blanket.
"The stack had been nicely framed by the power supply (blocking the fan), some adapter cards and the side of the case. Until it started smouldering."
Will swiftly flipped the computer over and tipped the embers onto the floor, where he stomped them out.
The user never gave him an explanation for why the paper had been inserted. Will speculated that maybe dropping them into the wastebaskets destined for the shredder was not deemed secure enough. Or perhaps reaching for the bin was too much of an effort.
Whatever the reason, the user had spent the last few months feeding handwritten notes into the 1-2mm gap in the case between the blanking plates for the floppy drives (not fitted due to security requirements). Once the paper was out of sight, it was out of mind.
"Apart from a stern talking to from me," sighed Will, "there were no other repercussions" for the user.
"My visits to help," he said, "finally came to an end a few months later when the task force was moved to another government agency."
Hopefully not one responsible for Health and Safety.
[5]
Creativity is the name of the game when it comes to user-inflicted computer destruction. Share your tales of the surprises you found when answering a call for help. An email to [6]On Call is all it takes. ®
Get our [7]Tech Resources
[1] https://www.theregister.com/Tag/on-call
[2] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_personal_tech/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=2&c=2YC@aSSFSv60KSe7bkHyI8wAAANc&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D2%26raptor%3Dcondor%26pos%3Dtop%26test%3D0
[3] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_personal_tech/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=3&c=33YC@aSSFSv60KSe7bkHyI8wAAANc&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D3%26raptor%3Deagle%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0
[4] https://www.theregister.com/2021/02/12/on_call/
[5] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_personal_tech/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=4&c=44YC@aSSFSv60KSe7bkHyI8wAAANc&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D4%26raptor%3Dfalcon%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0
[6] mailto:oncall@theregister.com
[7] https://whitepapers.theregister.com/
Whoops mind your head if there is a fire, and dont trip
ColinPa
My wife had to work in Spain. Their new building was almost complete - there were small problems like no switches on the wires sticking out of the light switch box, but that was "OK" - just put some tape over the wires. There were two sides of the building with a fire door in between. The builders needed access to both sides, so they put a steel bar across the top of the doorway to hold the fire door open. This was "fine" until someone nudged the door in passing and the steel bar fell - just missing them. They sovled this by moved the steel bar to the ground level - a perfect trip hazard.
The Spanish builders were surprised when my wife's manager refused to move in to the building until it was "UK Safe".
Re: Whoops mind your head if there is a fire, and dont trip
Empty1
The builders should have known better - Fire extinguishers are the tool to keep fire doors open.
When bananas attack ..
Anonymous Coward
Had a colleague who hated the smell of bananas, so we tried "aversion therapy" one lunchtime by putting a couple of banana skins inside his PC case. After a few days of hilarity he worked out what was going on and removed them with much grumbling. "Target Aquired!" after that we would randomly tape them in his desk drawers, cupboards or just leave them in his coat pocket.
Cider Drinkers - Icon
The desktop services dept, moved PC's over a weekends office moves, the ITSC in the wooden hut in the car park got the calls on Monday to deal with overheating machines that those that should have known better when performing the moves, but obviously didn't.
The self same inD'uhviduals who had pushed the machines & the vents up against the new nicely stuffed & fabric covered cubical walls in order that it looked nice.
Also other departments that built forts of cardboard boxes full of paperwork around their PC, then wondered why they overheated.
Social Services & Planning I'm looking at you.