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Don't they realise that the only effective protection against Corona Virus is to be as miserable as sin every minute of every day? The only way we are going to get through this as a country is if anytime you see someone smile you must immediately phone the police who will send a helicopter with a bucket of cold water to douse the miscreants. And obviously, leaving the safe confined air recirculated close proximity of a sub for the shore - madness - how do they know that that bit of shore wasn't contaminated by a seagull that had perched on a contaminated Amazon parcel on a doorstep and then perched on the dockside. It would only take one sailor to trip face first and lick the dock and then everyone on board would have died in seconds.

"And obviously, leaving the safe confined air recirculated close proximity of a sub for the shore - madness"

Quite. I am sure after they've been back for a day they'll be clamouring to get back in the tin can and resurface again when all this is over!

If only they had realised that all you have to do for a free 'get together in a big group' pass was to bang on a pot, clap and put up a sign that says 'thank you NHS'?

Don't forget the fireworks...

That's a sore point. My daughter's boss got 3rd degree burns from a covidiot letting off a firework!

And remember, you'd better not be the first to stop clapping this Thursday evening! Or else that 'rona will git ya!

Nevil Shute...On the beach....just saying.....

ACs can't have an icon, so I've got this one for you -->

Personally I think this is stupid, if they've all been at sea together for months then the chances of them catching covid-19 off each other is 0 so why not let them have a bit of fun before they rejoin the lock downed populace?

Be careful, you're using logic and might be fined!

But, acting as the devil's advocate once again, I guess the problem here is not any contamination risk, but simply that they disobeyed orders: The military is supposed to blindly obey orders. Logic and reasoning are not supposed to interfere.

Enough with your sensible arguments and flawless reasoning. Understanding of facts and a common sense attitude is not permitted.

For the purposes of the act, I think it's entirely reasonable to consider the sailers to be members of the same household, given they've been in a tin can for months as ordered.. Providing they're quarantined, frankly it's not an issue if they organise a mass orgy on the dockside, let alone have a BBQ...

We need to apply common sense and science...

>We need to apply common sense and science...

Burn the heretic!

They intentionally distance sub crews from any news that could "compromise" the mission.

It's also been said in a few articles that sub crews were explicitly not told about the pandemic.

Unless they were informed on the way back to port, it's a literal case of they didn't know at the time.

Hope nobody gets canned for it.

Getting shades of Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect with the house and bypass thing.

The RN needs to show Uncle Trump they have good control over their people, as to not create a similar situation as with the skipper of that US aircraft carrier. But by slapping it down in public, they created just that similar situation... What was that effect's name?

At the very least, the captain would have been kept informed of the situation at home and it would have been up to him to tell the crew.

I thought they had to listen in to Radio 4 on long wave anyway - if it went off air they were allowed to nuke Russia.

In any case this is a daft reaction by the Admiralty, as they have been effectively all been members of the same household for months. It is no different than me having a BBQ in my garden with the wife & kids.

There's a fairly high chance the local plod will come around to harangue you for that.

Careful, they'll start threatening to patrol supermarkets for people buying sausages and burgers. Only to be shut down by a superior upon realising that made the force appear staffed by a bunch of control-freak fascist morons (again).

If Navy plod had turned up at the dockside, they would have been the only risk factor.

Icon: sign of a successful submarine voyage!

So they should, it's unnecessary pollution.

They were not in a position to nuke anyone I think - they were in a nuclear powered attach submarine, which I think tend to be kitted out with conventional weapons.

It is known that Soviets had nuclear torpedoes in the cold war, and also, unknown to the U.S., during the run up to the Cuban Missile Crisis. One of the torpedoes, the T-15, was designed to create a tsunami to cause havoc in coastal towns. The downside - it would crack the hull of every ship within a five mile radius. Essentially, a suicide weapon.

Well, "tend to" and "unable to" are very different things. I don't know if they have anything like this on the boat right now, depends on the mission and the RN but I give you the...

BGM-109A Tomahawk Land Attack Missile – Nuclear (TLAM-N) with a W80 nuclear warhead.

Now, thats been retired on the US side and I presume the RN and would have nowhere near the reach to damage anything in Russia but I am just throwing it out there for coversation's sake.

What are the chances of there being a Rear Admiral Submarines! And he's in charge of that branch of the Royal Navy too. That even beats Judge Judge.

What's that? It's his rank, not his name? Party pooper. That's appropriate I suppose...

Given that they all “live” at the same address it seems entirely reasonable. Can we no longer have barbecues in our own back yards for members of the same household?

Enough time in quarantine and we'll be grilling up members of our households...

Not here we won't. We had the foresight to start a rat farm on our ground floor.

I heard you could make it big if you got in on the ground floor, but I just don't want to take part in the same old rat race.

Well, I live alone now...

(shouted just to be safe)

But they left the confines of their backyard / garden / home for the last 9 months or so.

How dare they be so blase about the risk they have put themselves and the rest of the country under by being definitely free of the virus and in the open air near nobody else.

Don't they realise that they were putting nobody at risk including themselves and the public - such shameful behaviour should result in them all being keel hauled whilst the sub is at sea after being made to climb out a torpedo tube.

And what about future risk - they may get the virus and not realise then go back to sea and dock in a port in another country and spread the disease there - it's not like it is already a pandemic or anything.

Who do they think they are anyway - just because they finish a tour of duty they think they can then just relax and enjoy themselves - they should be protecting our country not resting from a long tour.

Not sure how the Royal Navy does it but in the US when a ship returns from a patrol they usually have the friends and family there to greet them.

Longest patrol in UK history? Check

No welcome on return? Check

No family on return? Double check

Have the brass come down on your leadership because they tried to bring some life back into your face in some small way? Triple check

The RN leadership better get their $hit together because this is going to hit every other patrol boat and ship in their fleet faster than they can possibly comprehend. I can't imagine being stuck in a submarine, let alone on a patrol of that duration. Good Job submariners

If they are saying that they are not "all at the same address", then how will the do the social distancing thing when they get back onboard the sub - the corridors are narrow and space is very limited.

They protect the country, let them have a bit of relaxation when they are above the surface and perhaps those that want to try and criminalise everything should just go and get a life.

These and other impossible tasks brought to you by the Ministry of Fun.

I wonder what this Fine Organ's former defence correspondent would have made of this

It isn't that anything was wrong - it just didn't look good from the uninformed viewers standpoint. Which embarrassed someone higher ranking - and that is why there are hot coals in the future for the skipper. And that is a damn shame.

No good will come from pandering to the uninformed.

As opposed to pandering to the uniformed?

"It isn't that anything was wrong - it just didn't look good from the uninformed viewers standpoint. Which embarrassed someone higher ranking - and that is why there are hot coals in the future for the skipper. And that is a damn shame."

Agree. It seems quite likely the crew had been promised the party some time ago and were looking forward to it (maybe it's a tradition?), so cancelling it would be extremely bad for morale. I think the captain made the right decision and I hope the enquiry see it too.

So inform them. Anything short of an orgy on the dockside for a crew deployed that long should be tolerated. You don't come down on your team because they are unwinding from a successful mission and returning to a world of chaos. Bad leadership right there and a good way to lose not only the trust of this boat but every other boat that hears about it.

Bloody puritans... They glut on misery.

So, after being packed like sardines in a tin can for a month they try to spread out little on the shoreside the are scolded for spreading out a little and ordered back to their tin can? It's military so it all makes perfect sense.

Longest patrol in history? Good job lads!

---good so far---

Now get the f%$k back in the boat.

---annnnnd you lost your chance at bolstering morale---