News: 2022-04-12_22-57-00_le-bayern-elimine-par-villarreal-grosse-

  ARM Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life (Terry Pratchett, Jingo)

Le Bayern éliminé par Villarreal, grosse surprise à Munich

(2022-04-12_22-57-00)


FC Bayern Munich FCB

1

FIN

1

Villarreal CF VIL

52'

Le football Robert Lewandowski

Samuel Chukwueze

Le football 88'

Ligue des Champions Grand favori de la compétition, le Bayern est éliminé de la Ligue des Champions. Battus en Espagne à l’aller, les Bavarois n’ont pas réussi à totalement inverser la situation au retour contre Villarreal. Le Bayern avait pourtant ouvert le score grâce à un but de Lewandowski, mais Samuel Chukwueze a plombé les Allemands en toute fin de match. Villarreal arrache le partage et s’offre un ticket pour le dernier carré (1-1).

Le Bayern Munich, battu 1-0 à l’aller à Villarreal, n’a pu faire mieux qu’un match nul un but partout à domicile face aux Espagnols mardi en demi-fianles retour et est par conséquent éliminé dès les quarts de finale de la Ligue des Champions de football.

Robert Lewandowski (52e) avait ouvert le score, mais il ne fallait aux Espagnols qu’une seule frappe cadrée, par Samuel Chukwueze pour égaliser et envoyer les hommes d’Unai Emery en demi-finale (88e). Le “Sous-marin jaune”, vainqueur de l’Europa League la saison dernière, atteint le dernier carré de la C1 pour la deuxième fois de son histoire, 16 ans après l’épopée de 2006.



What If Bill Gates Was a Stand-Up Comedian?

1. None of his jokes would be funny.
2. Subliminal message hyping Microsoft and Windows 98 would be inserted
throughout his performance.
3. The audio system (running Windows NT) would always crash right before Bill
got to a punch line. At that time one of the managers would announce,
"Please hold tight while we diagnose this intermittent issue."
4. Tickets for Bill's show would be handed out for free in an attempt to
attract customers away from Netscape's shows.
5. Industry pundits would call Bill's show "innovative" and would ask "Why
doesn't IBM have a stand-up routine? This is exactly why OS/2 is failing in
the market."
6. Bill's show would be called "ActiveHumor 98"
7. In a perfect imitation of his Windows 95 OS, Bill wouldn't be able to tell
a joke and walk around at the same time.
8. Audience members would have to sign a License Agreement in which one of the
terms is "I agree never to watch Linus Torvalds' show, 'GNU/Humorux'".
9. All audience members would receive a free CD of Internet Explorer 4.0, with
FakeJava(R) and ActiveHex(tm) technology.
10. Bill Gates would appear on Saturday Night Live, causing ratings to drop
even further.