Houseplants could be slowing down your Wi-Fi, according to Broadband Genie, which reckons surfers can increase broadband speeds by almost 40 percent just by moving their router away from any greenery.

The UK internet price comparison service has come out with a classic piece of silly season promotion - and, yes, we are covering it to make readers smile.

Having large houseplants or an extensive collection of indoor plants can impact your broadband speed, [1]Broadband Genie states. This is because moist soils and dense foliage can absorb and deflect signals, and while this effect is typically only minor, in a small flat or room with lots of plants this can have a real and measurable impact on your internet speed, it claims.

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Of course, there is some element of truth in this, in that all materials will absorb or attenuate radio signals to a certain extent. But in a typical home, the walls and intervening floors and ceilings are likely to be the biggest barriers to Wi-Fi signals, unless perhaps, your house is a cannabis farm.

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Not to mention interference from your neighbors' networks, if you have numerous other homes close by (this writer has many neighbors and can report five or six other networks visible when using a Wi-Fi analyzer app).

However, Broadband Genie advises not to tuck your router or Wi-Fi access point away behind plant pots, which seems a strange thing to do anyway, and to keep it as far away from your plants as possible.

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The biz claims that in an experiment by "Broadband Genie researchers," it found moving your router away from your houseplants could increase the broadband speed by 36 percent. This could be because they moved the router closer to whatever device they were testing with.

"We were shocked to discover just how much of a difference it can make simply moving your router away from your houseplant collection," says the firm's "Broadband Expert" Peter Ames.

"Take stock of where your plants are and where your router is currently placed, and do what you can to ensure your router has a clear path to where your internet is most used, with no houseplants blocking your Wi-Fi signal."

[6]FCC plans to kill Wi-Fi on school buses, hotspots for library patrons

[7]Classic Psion fan releases proof-of-concept language server for OPL

[8]How to find forgotten Wi-Fi passwords and SSIDs in Windows and Android

[9]Australian university used Wi-Fi location data to identify student protestors

Other advice on the interwebs indicates the [10]best plants to buy and keep in your home in order to absorb all that harmful electromagnetic radiation that is emitted by modern gadgets such as, you know, computers and wireless networks.

Broadband Genie suggests deploying a mesh network or using Wi-Fi extenders to sidestep any absorption issues. Alternatively, consider a wired connection, it says. Powerline network kit, which uses the mains wiring, is pretty much as fast and reliable as Ethernet these days.

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Meanwhile, the [12]Wi-Fi 8 standard , which is still under development, is set to focus on greater reliability and delivering a better experience, by using techniques such as steering the signal toward the intended receiver. However, this is not expected to be finalized until 2028.

Move those pesky plants today people. ®

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[1] https://www.broadband.co.uk/

[2] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=2&c=2aNLEFTXlKv9ZXuKUE_V1qQAAA5c&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D2%26raptor%3Dcondor%26pos%3Dtop%26test%3D0

[3] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=4&c=44aNLEFTXlKv9ZXuKUE_V1qQAAA5c&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D4%26raptor%3Dfalcon%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0

[4] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=3&c=33aNLEFTXlKv9ZXuKUE_V1qQAAA5c&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D3%26raptor%3Deagle%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0

[5] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=4&c=44aNLEFTXlKv9ZXuKUE_V1qQAAA5c&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D4%26raptor%3Dfalcon%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0

[6] https://www.theregister.com/2025/09/05/fcc_to_kill_wifi_school_buses/

[7] https://www.theregister.com/2025/08/27/vintage_computing_boffin_resurrects_opl/

[8] https://www.theregister.com/2025/07/25/find_wifi_passwords_ssids_windows_android/

[9] https://www.theregister.com/2025/08/25/asia_tech_news_in_brief/

[10] https://bokashiliving.com/anti-rad-plants-in-your-home/

[11] https://pubads.g.doubleclick.net/gampad/jump?co=1&iu=/6978/reg_offbeat/front&sz=300x50%7C300x100%7C300x250%7C300x251%7C300x252%7C300x600%7C300x601&tile=3&c=33aNLEFTXlKv9ZXuKUE_V1qQAAA5c&t=ct%3Dns%26unitnum%3D3%26raptor%3Deagle%26pos%3Dmid%26test%3D0

[12] https://www.theregister.com/2025/01/02/wifi_8_feature/

[13] https://whitepapers.theregister.com/