Shirley MacLaine died today in a freak psychic collision today. Two freaks
in a van [Oh no!! It's the Copyright Police!!] Her aura-charred body was
laid to rest after a eulogy by Jackie Collins, fellow member of SAFE [Society
of Asinine Flake Entertainers]. Excerpted from some of his more quotable
comments:
"Truly a woman of the times. These times, those times..."
"A Renaissance woman. Why in 1432..."
"A man for all seasons. Really..."
After the ceremony, Shirley thanked her mourners and explained how delightful
it was to "get it together" again, presumably referring to having her now dead
body join her long dead brain.